Subject: CODY: TO DAYLAN AND OTHERS From: email@example.com (Mithryl) Date: 1997/04/09 Message-Id: <firstname.lastname@example.org> Newsgroups: alt.personals.bondage,alt.sex.bondage I received this letter from Daylan. From xxxxxxxxxxxxx.///.edu Tue Apr 8 09:21:29 1997 Date: Tue, 08 Apr 97 03:17:39 EDT From: Daylan <xxxxxxxxxxxxx.///.edu> To: Cody <email@example.com> Subject: I want to know something Is this for real? More to the point, is this person named Cody real? Can you really be this extremist in your actions? I want to know. Everything. Anything you can tell me about you. Your past. Your present. Your future. I am waiting. D. Dear Daylan, I will try to satisfy your request. My name is Cody Ann Michaels, I am a girl, and I am 16. I am also a pain freak. In a big way. Let me explain. Shortly after I started the treatments to enlarge my breasts, I noticed I was beginning to experience continual pain in my muscles and joints. This was diagnosed as my having a rare condition somewhat akin to arthritis. I had always had it, but the breast treatments had made it worse. At times it can be very painful, so that I cannot even bear to move and other times it is more like having an electric current running through my body. No one can tell I have it. On the outside, I look normal, as much as any thirteen year old with a 54-24-36 body can look. Coupled with this, another side effect of the treatments is that they keep me perpetually horny. But having anyone touch me drives me insane. Furthermore, as my breasts grew heavier, it became an almost impossible chore to hold them up. The doctors decided that in order to keep my back straight, I must always wear a tight corset with a steel bar up the back. At the top is a wide leather collar that holds my neck in position and my head back. The pain, however, grew worse. Possibly you will understand therefore, why I originally took refuge in drugs. I lived only to get high and to forget the terrible ordeal going on within myself. I must have used almost any kind of drug there is. It was ruining my life. I eventually discovered that the only way to deal with this chronic pain was to seek out more pain. This created an endorphin high, somewhat like being on drugs. In desperation, I put an erotic ad on the internet, even though I feel deeply ashamed to be doing it, practically exposing myself in front of all those people. In it, I begged to be abused and degraded. I was surprised by the results. Many cruel and degenerate people wrote to me. Many suggested the most horrible punishments that they would like inflicted on me, either by themselves or someone else. Desperately I tried to keep my head. But the letters arrived wave on wave. A story I am posting today (alt.sex.stories, etc.) will give you some idea. Finally, I gave in and let them do what they wanted. Did I mention I am an empath? Everything they suggested I felt as if it was actually happening. Usually, this was because my roommate, Kelly, and her boy friend was doing these things to me. We had many entertaining nights as she dragged me through the underworld of Manhattan, turning me into a human sex sewer. Now, as 18, I feel myself used up, desperately trying to reclaim my life, hold a job, raise a kid. Without drugs, the pain is even worse and the compulsion to be hurt more insistent -- a constant companion shadowing every movement. To satisfy its needs I place myself at the service of all who would use me. Submissively, Cody P.S. I am morphic in time. Where I am, so is the date. If you want me to be 12, I will be 12. But I have trouble with anything much older than that.